The S&P 500 tracks 500 of America's biggest companies. The SNP 500 tracks where your money actually goes. It is the only index with the courage to say it out loud: piss flows upstream, shit flows downstream — and you live downstream.
Every market is a river. At the top of the river: hedge funds, market makers, insiders, and that one guy who sold the exact top. They piss upstream — against gravity, against nature, against you — and somehow it works for them every single time.
Downstream is where the shit ends up. Downstream is where retail lives. Meme stocks pumping again? AMC? GME? Beautiful. Enjoy the ride. Just remember which direction the river runs. $SNP is the index for people who finally looked up and asked: who keeps pissing on me, and how do I get up there?
Inclusion in the Shit N Pee 500 is a rigorous, fully unaudited process. To qualify, an asset must meet at least three of the following criteria:
The index is rebalanced whenever the committee finishes its business, washes its hands, and remembers the password.
| Ticker | Component | Weight | Direction |
|---|---|---|---|
| $PLOP | Heavy Drop Industries | 14.2% | downstream |
| $GAS | Silent But Volatile Corp | 12.0% | upstream |
| $FLSH | Round Trip Holdings | 11.7% | downstream |
| $CLOG | Liquidity Blockage Ltd | 9.9% | downstream |
| $BIDET | Clean Exit Capital | 8.1% | upstream |
| $WIPE | Aftermath Solutions | 7.5% | upstream |
| $SNP | The Index Itself (yes, we hold ourselves) | 36.6% | upstream |
Remaining 493 components withheld pending toilet paper shortage. Weights may not sum to 100% because math is also downstream.
Component disclosure: components marked LISTED are live parody satellites of the index — no utility, no groups, no roadmap, no promises, launched from the same committee wallet as $SNP. They exist to make the index real. $SNP is the flagship. Bathroom advice only.